For my English assignment this week I got to indulge a little and we were asked to give our opinion on an aspect in life that we felt we were being increasingly controlled. I chose parenting......so here goes..
There is an increasing pressure in society today to live our lives in a way that others see as correct. We are told on many occasions what we should be eating, drinking and even how we should dress.
Another aspect of this is how we parent our children. This is an aspect that particularly interests me as I have 3 children of my own.
There is a pressure on women from the minute they find out they are pregnant...don't eat this, don't eat that. Don't sleep on your back and be sure to take folic acid to prevent spinal problems. Whilst some of these can be a good thing and have been medically proven to benefit both mother and child others just seem to spring from nowhere and then change again 5 years later and tell them to do the exact opposite. There seems to be so much contradiction with the advice that is given.
You are told to sterilise everything that goes near your children's mouths for the first 12 months of their lives. Again this is to protect the child from dangerous bugs and germs. But what about building up a natural resistance to such germs through tiny amounts of exposure to them. We watch our children 24 hours a day to make sure they don't play to vigorously on play equipment at the park and injure themselves. Is this stifling any sense of adventure they may have and making them more apprehensive to trying new things.
As your child grows so does the pressure to get things just right. There are a multitude of programmes on TV about parenting. Each one seems to deal in the same sort of issues but in a slightly different way. Whist these programmes strive to make life easier by telling you the right way to bring them up they can also just increase the guilt you feel when you see yourself as getting it wrong. I think this is a terrible situation as it only makes what is difficult and stressful anyway even more so.
Today, I feel, we have a tendency to over analyse and research everything and I think this is one of the reasons this is happening. I think parents need to be given more confidence in their own ability to know what is best for their children.
Advice should always be on offer for those who feel they need it but there also needs to be a little more common sense. It took me into my 5th year of parenting to be able to sit back and think that I was doing ok. My children were happy, healthy and enjoying life. So they might get a bit dirty when making mud pies and they often end up with various bumps and bruises from running around at the park but what does that matter in the grand scheme of things.
